Monday, September 2, 2013

Modestly Monday {No. 47} You Were Worth It

Blue T-Shirt Blouse, Gray Undershirt, Bangles-- Walmart
Blue Sandals-- Thrifted
White Skirt, White and Tan Swirly Scarf-- can't remember
Peacock Feather Necklace, Gold and Crystal Headband-- crafted by me

This was a slightly different style for me, but I ended up loving it!  The flowy white skirt contrasted by the blue shirt made for a fun summery look.  And, of course, it gave me an excuse to wear my very blue sandals!

My hubby found this peacock feather charm for me and I simply slipped it on a chain to wear it the following day.  It went amazingly with my collection of bangles.  I topped off the simple necklace by adding a light colored scarf (it also tied in the light skirt!).  So much fun here!

For the final touch, I clipped back a small section of hair from the front and wore my favorite headband, one I made last year.  I so love headbands that feel like elven tiaras!

As I wrap up posting outfit pictures from when I was pregnant with Promise, it is sad, yet I also feel a readiness in my heart to post these last pictures.  And they are the very last.  These were taken the day before I lost my baby and life became harder and Heaven became sweeter.  I just spoke with an older gentleman at church yesterday who had also lost his first child to a miscarriage.  Even though he has seen many years since then and also has a quiver-full of children and grandchildren, his voice still held such a longing to meet his first child in heaven.  He was one of those dirt-honest people with me as he said, even as I tried to smile bravely and reason that at least we'll get to see our children again, "It's just hard.  It hurts.".

He's so right.  This is where taking everything day by day comes back into the picture.  I've had mothers tell me that the sharp pain of it will fade over time, but the ache will never leave.

And I do ache, even as the sharp pain of it doesn't block out the light so much as it used to.  I think of the way Promise made me smile so much and it hurts... and tears usually come like they are right now.

But I also think of how precious Heaven is to me now.  And I never would have given up this pregnancy, even if I had known I would never meet my child this side of eternity.  Promise was worth it; my sweet baby who was to be born as spring began, now safe where it is never dark.

I know that my outfit posts have been riddled with reflection, sadness, confusion, and many other things the last three weeks and I thank you all for the prayers and encouragement I have received from you all.

God bless!


Josie said...

My heart hearts for you, my friend. Yet I know God will make beautiful things out of the ashes. He has a reason for this, remember that. I'm praying for you always. On a side note, I love the outfit. Beautiful, stylish and feminine as always. I love the headband as well. Very elven-ish indeed. :) Love you!

Kelsey said...

I have been reading your blog for the last few years, yet just dont comment as much as I should. My heart hurts for you, my dear. My mom went though miscarriage a few months back. Though it was hard, I cant imagine if it was mine and I lost my baby. I am so very sorry. I am sure Promise will be dancing in heaven with Jesus. Btw, I love the name Promise, so very sweet, and such a great reminder that Jesus Promises to comforter us!

I love your outfit. Your so pretty. I love how you have blue eyes, and brown hair, its so pretty. Most people have blonde hair and blue eyes, but I love the contrast of your eyes and hair. Your beautiful!

May Jesus wrap His arms around you during this hard time,He loves you very much Rachel.

Love you!

Your sister in Christ,

Rebecca Ann said...

I am praying for you Rachel. I can't begin to imagine how it feels for Promise to not be with you anymore and be with Jesus. I love your outfit and that necklace definitely brings out your blue eyes. :)

Love in Christ,