|Me and Baby J at 11 weeks!|
Parenthood means sacrifice... and I am already glimpsing a small picture of what that looks like.
So far, motherhood has meant making sure everything I eat and drink is safe for my baby.
Motherhood means not taking that one medication that always helped my IBS issues.
Motherhood means forcing down stinky and nasty-tasting-making-me-gag pills several times a day.
Motherhood means laying on the couch in exhaustion after doing nothing!
Motherhood means throwing up with no warning.
Motherhood means my body changing, thickening, swelling out of my jeans and into more comfortable maxi skirts and elastic-waist pants.
And then I place my hand on my abdomen, beneath my churning stomach, and think of the galloping heartbeat I heard two weeks ago.
And it is already worth it.
|Me and Baby J at 12 weeks!|
Because what is throwing up when in six months I'll be holding my long-prayed-for child?
What is my body never being the same again compared to looking into the eyes of a life made from the love Andrew and I share?
These struggles are a miracle I thought I would never have!
The fact that when Andrew and I were trying to figure out how to get me medical help so we could start a family, dreading in our hearts that it would be a long and complicated journey... the fact that as I mourned each day that I was childless, knowing that my deep wish was that I would have at least seen a doctor by the time we visited my family in February... the fact that when we had stopped hoping because it just hurt too much THAT was the time God chose to say YES! is so beautiful and screams of how much He cherishes us. We hadn't come to a new place of trust or surrender. We were still heartbroken. And this is how He is choosing to heal us.
I am so thankful.
Tomorrow I set out for that February trip to see my family... I haven't been treated for infertility, instead I am almost finished with my first trimester of pregnancy. *thankful, overwhelmed tears*
Please remember today how much God loves you, my friends. He is a God who loves to say YES to His children and revels in our joy! He doesn't always say yes when or in the way we want Him to, but He hears our hearts and loves to shower His grace upon us. HE. LOVES. US. Always remember.