Dear...

... October skies, 

Sometimes sunny, sometimes stormy.  That has been you this year.  It has very much mirrored my life as of late.  Today you are overcast and cold.  You are changing the leaves into deep brilliance.

And I can't believe that you are nearly gone.

... TIME!!!,

While chatting with my Mom today I finally burst out:

"Is this what you were talking about when you said that time goes so much faster when you're an adult?"

Because you have, indeed, gone by at the speed of lightening.  I feel like I'm still trying to grasp September and here I am at the brink of November.

... First half of my 20th year,

SO much has happened, yet it seem like no time has passed.  It is now too cold to keep the apartment windows open for long, yet wasn't I just buying sleeveless blouses???

You have held more grief than any other time in my life... I can only hope and pray that my sorrow will be turned to dancing.  That this is just the dark before the dawn.

... Walk in the wind,

You were amazing.  Seriously.  I needed you so much.  That really sums it up.

... Dom (or Dominic on special occasions) aka, my Camera,

As you know, I've been taking more pictures.  I went through a time when I hardly ever picked you up, but have been hoping to nip that nasty habit in the bud.

Life is just too beautiful and goes by too quickly for me not to capture at least some of these incredible moments.

... Andrew,

Oh, my dear, you looked so gorgeous baking a homemade pumpkin pie!!!  You are such an incredible cook and have made our house smell incredible recently.

You are such a blessing.  I love you.

And thank you so much for the coffee.

... Pumpkin Spice Latte reheated in my Dwarf Mug,

You equal joy in this cold months.  I could go on and on and on...

I am quite fond of you both, drink and mug.  Very much so.



... Jesus,

I have been unfaithful to You.  I have been untrusting of You.   I have been angry at You.  I have been undiscerning, bitter, and no where near diligent in seeking a relationship with You.   But I have never been unloved by You.   Help me now to keep my heart hidden in You and find my joy in who You are, even when I don't understand Your plan.  I do love You.   Help me to live it.   Thank you for never ceasing to love me.

Love,

Rachel